Cheshire, CT – Last Thursday Betty Dixon was running late for a job interview to be a grocery store manager so she sent her astral projection ahead to let the company know she would be there soon.

When her physical body arrived thirty minutes after her astral projection she was shocked to learn that her projection had stolen the job right from under her.

“We’ve received a lot of viable candidates for the position,” said store owner Jerry Cantel, “but none as qualified as Betty’s astral projection. During the interview there was a mess in aisle four. Betty’s astral projection teleported to aisle four in an instant and cleaned up the mess. I’m very excited to see what else she can do. As far as Betty’s physical body, I wasn’t impressed. Lateness isn’t tolerated at this company.”

“I tried to tell the store owner that my astral projection is actually me, but he wouldn’t hear it. He just kept repeating ‘you’re late’ and that I could learn a thing or two from my astral projection. Now I have to astrally project to the store every day while I sit at home using all of my energy to keep my projection alive. I’m like a host for myself.”

Meanwhile, Betty’s astral projection has already received the Employee of the Week award. She is a favorite with the cashiers and clerks who say she makes their job much easier. “I can put my hand through her,” said Kelly, a cashier, “that’s the kind of manager I want.”