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How To Go With The Flow When The Flow Is A River Of Hot Steaming Shit

Sometimes you don’t have a choice but to go with the flow. Decisions have been made and you have been rendered powerless to effect the change you wish to see in your life or country.

​Many are up in arms about Donald Trump being our new president but there’s nothing we can do about it. The election is over and all we can do now is go with the flow, even if that flow happens to be a river of hot, steaming shit.

​So how does one go with the flow in a river of hot, steaming shit? How do you navigate a thick lava stream of burning, flaming shit? It’s not as hard as you think.

1. Keep your mouth closed. You might be tempted to open your mouth at some point, but all that does is invite gallons of red-hot shit fire into your mouth – whether literally or metaphorically – from people who do not share your point of view.

2. Look for the benefits. This river of hot steaming shit might be good for your skin. You might release toxins due to the heat. Think how good it will feel to rinse off. Your threshold for pain is raised. What could be better than to sustain more pain?

3. It’s a healthy reminder that life is suffering. The Buddha taught that life is suffering. We all live and die and are born again into countless lives due to our ignorance. Sometimes along the way you swim in a cauldron of flaming feces. That’s just part of being human. Get used to it.

4. Pigs swim in their own shit too and they’re smart. It’s potentially a sign of intelligence to swim in your own shit. It’s time the Mensa community acknowledged us. We won’t be ignored any longer while we wallow in our own excrement.

5. You have a head start if you end up being born in hell in your next life. You might end up in hell and be forced to swim in shit. All of the other damned souls around you will be moaning and crying out in horror at their fate while you do the backstroke like it’s Club Med.

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