Santa Monica, CA – Tracy Reid, a beautiful, smart, charming, and overall genetically perfect woman with glowing skin who has known little – if any – hardship in life, swears by her plant-based diet of vegan shakes.
Reid switched to her current diet when she was feeling a bit sluggish one morning and didn’t have the required energy to go to her 12PM hot yoga class.
“It was so unlike me to feel like I couldn’t achieve something. A beautiful friend of mine, Rebecca, who is a former model that made millions of dollars and now lives on the beach asked me if I had eaten any bread recently. I actually had eaten some organic freshly baked bread made by monks in the south of France the night before. No wonder I was feeling a tad sluggish.”
Reid immediately cut out all bread from her diet and went full plant-based. “I immediately felt the effects. I had tremendous energy and a renewed faith in the universe.”
A normal looking woman in Reid’s neighborhood who Reid told about her diet told Egobaby, “Oh what a miracle it was that she was able to look even more beautiful than she already did. Fucking bitch. She told me I could also be less sluggish if I drank her plant shakes. I told her I wasn’t sluggish but then I realized she was using ‘sluggish’ as a synonym for ‘ugly.'”
Reid is often seen running on the beach with her golden retriever, Lover, at 7AM in a white linen outfit through which you can see the outline of perfectly shaped breasts, sans bra. No one has ever seen her sweat and the baristas never charge her for coffee.
She is in the beginning stages of getting her plant-based diet on store shelves. She is using money that is always in her bank account that comes from the ether in an account reserved for the blessed and divinely beautiful.
