It’s getting harder and harder these days to avoid becoming a Nazi.

White nationalism is an enticing offer to many with its violent anger, guns, lack of dance or music, ugly genetic pool, terrible food, zero sense of humor, and complete lack of compassion for humanity, not to mention a blatant disregard for the way the world is evolving.

The real question is why wouldn’t you want to be a Nazi??? You get a torch and a solid shot at not getting replaced by a Jew. But unfortunately you’re outnumbered and the world will hate you and you’ll never get seated at a good table at restaurants.

So, here are a few things you can do to avoid becoming a Nazi:

1. Have sex regularly. The less you have sex the angrier you get and the angrier you get the less you’re likely to have sex and so on and so forth. The anger builds and builds until one day, you guessed it…you’re a Nazi!

2. Admit to yourself that without black people you won’t have good music. If you take away the blues you don’t get to have rock n roll, you don’t get metal, you don’t get pop music, you don’t get jazz, you don’t get shit. You can listen to Wagner if you want. That should be fun for you and your terrible parties.

3. Try a Jewish accountant just once and see if you want to give that up afterwards. These guys know a thing or two about money. We get it, that’s the reason you hate them, but what if you didn’t hate them? What if getting replaced by a Jew got you a bigger tax return? Just think about it is all we’re saying.

4. Try a fresh bagel right out of the oven. This is tied into #3 above. The fresher the bagel you eat the more your feet are turned away from white supremacy. It’s been proven.

5. Realize that without Jews you have to say goodbye to Facebook. Are you ready to stop getting all of those happy birthday messages?

6. Realize that the best thing Nazis ever invented was Fanta. And that’s only because they couldn’t get their hands on Coke.