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Mercury Retrograde, Republicans, And A Lack Of Love Caused Earthquakes Say Some SoCal Natives

Southern California recently felt upwards of a 7.1 earthquake from 7/4-7/6. There are more earthquakes on the way and a few LA natives believe it has nothing to do with tectonic plate shifts and more to do with other phenomena. Namely…

  • The political state of our country
  • A lack of love
  • Mercury retrograde

Tiffany, Los Angeles, CA – You don’t have to be Wiccan – which I am – to see that Mother Gaia is punishing us for the nation’s political state. As a former actress, part of my job is to provide constant support to my clients day and night – mainly gifs of cats and celebs – who are traumatized by these recent quakes. My “Yoga for the Homeless” program is one way we can get the earth to start believing in humans again.

Kevin, Marina del Rey, CA, boat lover, body enthusiast, narcissist – A lack of love is what caused the earthquakes and it can be remedied by all kinds of love because love. I believe in support and sharing myself. After the recent quakes I posted an Instagram pic of me with my shirt off on my boat that said: “Hey! Where the after-quake party at?!” Because we need to create hashtag community.

Todd & Lisa, Venice, CA

Lisa: I don’t have time to follow extraneous Instagram accounts about “geology” because my kids are racked with measles. The 250 astrology Instagram accounts I do follow, however, have clearly indicated Mercury is about to go retrograde. Never mind the earthquake – i.e. government propaganda – many I fear will lose their phone or sign contracts during Mercury retrograde. And a few unlucky souls will take a new job offer that won’t be all it’s cracked up to be. [In response to people losing their homes or loved ones, Lisa responded…] I’m more concerned with the purchasing of new electronic products.

Todd: Basically, I have a lot of student loans, debt, and stuff…also…laundry, so if it’s retrograde or an earthquake that takes me out I’m like deuces! Also, I just like to listen to like whatever Lisa says about astrology because it’s like easy. She doesn’t like making plans or decisions during retrograde which I like about her.


Reported by Jilly.

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